What you should pay special attention to
It's a misconception that violence can only occur physically in the form of punches, kicks or slaps. There are a number of other forms of violence, including psychological violence, stalking, sexual violence, economic violence, material violence and digital violence. In this article, we bring together a brief description of the different types of violence and highlight the signs you should pay special attention to if you are unsure whether a man is violent or not.
The different types of violence
Physical violence involves hitting, kicking, slapping or other forms of inappropriate abuse. Perhaps it involves daily and systematic punishment where there is no specific reason, or perhaps physical violence manifests itself as sudden outbursts of anger where a "normal" argument turns violent.
Psychological violence involves verbal and non-verbal actions, and it is considered psychological violence if you are rejected with hot/cold behavior, threatened or belittled by your partner over an extended period of time. There is often no real reason for the violent behavior and this in itself can contribute to low self-esteem.
Stalking is transgressive behavior and involves systematic stalking or harassment. It can be by an ex-boyfriend/ex-husband or another relationship that the woman has wanted to end.
Sexual violence involves rape or other forms of sexual violation such as prostitution. It is the direct or indirect attempt to perform sexual acts that the other person does not want. It can be uncomfortable groping or attempted forced intercourse.
Financial violence is when the man takes over the woman's finances and deprives her of control over her own funds. It can also mean that the man takes out loans and debts in the woman's name, or that the woman has to ask for money for food or show receipts for all purchases.
Material violence is when the man deliberately destroys property that has great financial or sentimental value to the woman. The man may tear up clothes and pictures to intimidate the woman or perhaps smash her phone to deny her access to the outside world.
Digital violence is when social media is used to violate and harass women. This can be by sharing nude photos without the woman's consent or by forcing the woman to share offensive material on sites and networks that promote misogyny.
Does the behavior seem familiar? Then it could be a sign that you are living with an abusive man
If the examples of the different types of violence ring a bell, or if even one of them resonates with you, you can seek help today. The purpose of violence, regardless of which one it is, is to destroy your self-esteem, distance you from your social network or incapacitate you completely. We always recommend that you consult a professional if you are unsure whether you are living with an abusive man. Often the signs will be obvious to the outside world, but harder for you to spot if you live with it on a daily basis. At Ellestedet Women's Crisis Center, we have the right professionals on staff, and you are always welcome to call us for advice or help.