STALKING

What is stalking?

If someone unwantedly contacts you, follows you, monitors you, approaches you in person, in writing or by phone, or otherwise harasses you over a long period of time, this is stalking.

If you are a victim of stalking, it can have fatal long-term consequences for your well-being. Your right to a safe life is threatened by the inappropriate behavior, and out of sheer powerlessness and fear, you may end up isolating yourself or suddenly find yourself in unmanageable financial debt.

I'm being stalked - get help right away

If you are unsure whether you are a victim of stalking, our professionals are always available for a confidential and non-binding conversation - 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Every year, 100,000 Danes nationwide experience stalking, so you are not alone! At Ellestedet, we meet you with empathy and understanding of your situation - we are here to help you make the right choice for you.

What is a stalker?

A stalker can be anyone. In one survey, 63% said they were stalked by a man and 19% were stalked by a woman. The remaining 18% don't know the gender of their stalker. All age groups are represented in the stalker types, and often the stalker and victim will be age-matched.
This information is taken from: Ministry of Justice, (2018): Extent and nature of stalking. A population survey 2017/2918

Below we have gathered the most common stalker types

Stalker types
The rejected stalker
This type of stalker has been rejected. This could be a boyfriend, partner, date, friend, neighbor, colleague, acquaintance or similar. The rejected stalker perceives themselves as a victim and can therefore be very persistent as they seek a misguided sense of justice.
The intimacy-seeking stalker
This type of stalker seeks an intimate relationship with a chosen person - often a celebrity. The intimacy-seeking stalker will often be completely unaffected by the repeated rejections.
The incompetent stalker
This type of stalker does not have a natural knowledge of how to build relationships and will therefore seek out a person through methods that have the opposite effect. The incompetent stalker often has varying degrees of impaired social functioning and the stalking will typically take place for short periods of time.
The vengeful stalker
This type of stalker feels unfairly treated and therefore wants revenge through stalking. The vengeful stalker is driven by the need to create fear and thus destroy the victim's life.
The psychopathic stalker
This type of stalker seeks control and sexual gratification. This is inherent in stalking and will be at its peak in preparation for an attack. The psychopathic stalker has no intention of warning or frightening their victim, but will strike without warning. This happens relatively rarely.

Do you have a relationship with your stalker?

At Ellestedet we are ready to help you
All of the above examples of psychological violence are some of the symptoms that you can and should be aware of if something in your relationship suddenly doesn't feel right. There is no shame in asking for help, and at Ellestedet you will only be met with great understanding of your situation. We don't judge you for the situation you find yourself in, but rather help you make the right choice for you! Our experience tells us that the sooner you get out of an emotionally abusive relationship, the better.

When is it stalking?

If you repeatedly experience one or more of the following events over the same period of time, you may be a victim of stalking. If in doubt, seek help and guidance, as a stalker's next steps are never predictable.
  • Someone is secretly monitoring or photographing you 
  • Someone follows you when you leave your home or workplace 
  • Someone makes eye contact with you and/or stares you down in the street 
  • A person seeks your attention by talking, touching or swearing
  • Someone contacts you up to several times a day via calls, SMS, emails or letters
  • Someone orders groceries, taxis or gifts in your name 
  • Someone finds confidential information about you online 
  • Someone is harassing you on social media 
  • Someone breaks into or vandalizes your home 
  • Someone spreads false rumors about you to your family, friends, employer or authorities 
  • Someone shares private photos or videos of you without your consent
  • A person tries to intimidate you by subjecting you to violence, threats or other unwanted behavior

Stalking is a criminal offense

As a result of a psychologically abusive relationship, you will most likely develop symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). In addition, you may/will experience sleep problems, anxiety, crying spells, hair loss, digestive problems, chronic fatigue and difficulty taking care of yourself and your children.
  1. The perpetrator's behavior must be harassing, e.g. in their contact/approach, stalking or in some other way 
  2. The behavior must be likely to violate the victim's privacy, e.g. by being unsafe, unpleasant or disruptive 
  3. The behavior directed at the victim must be systematic and persistent. This means that the perpetrator must have committed several harassing acts over a period of time, which can be very short or long 
As a result of a psychologically abusive relationship, you will most likely develop symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). In addition, you may/will experience sleep problems, anxiety, crying spells, hair loss, digestive problems, chronic fatigue and difficulty taking care of yourself and your children.

What is digital stalking?

If your stalker uses the internet, apps or other forms of technology to make unwanted contact with you, this is called digital stalking. Examples include the following:

 

  • Social media messaging
  • Digital surveillance via hacking email, social media profiles, etc.
  • Sharing personal images or information 
  • Identity fraud where the stalker orders goods in your name without your consent

 

It can be very difficult to know if you're a victim of digital stalking, and if you're unsure, we recommend asking for help to investigate. To get started, you can start by answering the following questions yourself: 


  • Have you shared your login details with a former friend or boyfriend who is now misusing them? 
  • What technical skills does the person you suspect of digital stalking have? 
  • Have you suddenly installed unfamiliar programs on your computer/phone? 
  • Does your stalker know things about you that you haven't shared with others? For example, your location, files or images 

 

If you can answer yes or agree to the above questions, it may indicate that your stalker has unwanted access to your private devices. The answers to these questions can also be a good starting point for a conversation with the relevant authorities or in a non-binding and confidential conversation with Ellestedet. 

 

Documentation is important 

If you want to go to the police with your suspicion of digital stalking, or any other form of stalking, it is important that you save all documentation of the unwanted behavior as far as possible. This could be screenshots of messages, call logs or unwanted access to your accounts - it is important that the time/date is clearly stated. 

How can you prevent digital stalking yourself? 

If you want to take action to prevent digital stalking, here's what you can do: 

 

  • Update systems and apps to the latest versions 
  • Use both strong and different passwords for your accounts 
  • Enable two-factor authentication on your devices 
  • Keep an eye on the WiFi you access
  • Delete unfamiliar programs or apps on your phone 
  • Review your sync settings and make sure your device is not syncing with a device you don't know 
  • Many apps use location services to improve user experience - turn them off in settings 
  • Review your social media privacy settings - for example, make your account private 
Mental violence is a criminal offense
Back in 2019, psychological violence was criminalized with a special section in the Criminal Code. It reads as follows:

§ 243. Anyone who belongs to or is closely associated with another person's household or has previously had such an association with the household, and who repeatedly over a period of time subjects the other person to grossly degrading, insulting or offensive behavior that is likely to unduly control the other person, is punished for psychological violence with a fine or imprisonment of up to 3 years.
Signs of psychological violence - get a legal aid lawyer
If you have reached the point where you want to report psychological violence, it is a good idea to ask for a legal aid lawyer. A legal aid lawyer is free of charge and can give you the right advice and guidance regarding the applicable legislation and the further course of action. This is done in parallel with the police investigating your case.

Digital stalking is a criminal offense

Just like all other types of stalking, digital stalking is also punishable under the Danish Criminal Code. It is therefore important to be familiar with the legislation below:
Unauthorized access to data/hacking:
§263 - A fine or imprisonment of up to 1 year and 6 months shall be imposed on anyone who, without authorization, gains access to another's computer system or data intended for use in a computer system.
(2) A fine or imprisonment of up to 6 months shall be imposed on anyone who, without the offence being covered by subsection (1), without authorization 1 unauthorized

1) opens a letter or other closed communication or record or acquaints himself/herself with the contents or

Illegal
eavesdropping
2) by means of a device secretly eavesdrops or records statements made in private, telephone conversations or other conversations between others or negotiations in a closed meeting in which the person concerned does not participate or to which the person concerned has gained unauthorized access.

Unauthorized photography

§264a - Anyone who unauthorizedly photographs persons who are in a place that is not freely accessible is punishable by a fine or imprisonment of up to 6 months. The same applies to anyone who unauthorizedly observes such persons using binoculars or other equipment.
GPS surveillance
§264b - Anyone who unauthorized by means of a GPS or other similar device records another person's movements is punishable by a fine or imprisonment for up to 6 months.

Image sharing

§264d - Anyone who unauthorizedly discloses messages or images concerning another person's private affairs or otherwise images of the person in question under circumstances that can obviously be required to be withheld from the wider public is punishable by a fine or imprisonment for up to 6 months. The provision also applies where the message or image relates to a deceased person.

Identity abuse

§264e - 1) uses information about another person, including civil registration number, name and image, to improperly impersonate this person or 2) discloses material where information about another person, including civil registration number, name and image, has been used to improperly manipulate this person's appearance.

I'm being stalked - ask for help!

Being a victim of stalking can be extremely intrusive and debilitating in your daily life. If you're unsure whether or not you're being stalked, you need to seek help to stop it as soon as possible. At Ellestedet, you will be met by professionals who know exactly what it takes to help you move forward in your current life situation.

DO YOU NEED HELP?

CALL NOW: 51 15 65 66

We are a temporary home. A women's crisis center for women and children who have experienced violence.

You can contact us - around the clock.

We listen to you. Together we will find out if a stay with us is a good solution for you. We can give you advice and guidance on what you can do in your situation.

We can help you with legal assistance, help you clarify your employment, career or challenges at work. We can help you with visitation arrangements or anything else that may weigh heavily on your close relationships.
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